Rainbows and Goddesses in Training

dancing in my kitchen

laughing on the lawn

beautiful granddaughters

playing in the rainbows mist

 i was bidding and watching an ebay auction and i was feeling so great and confident.  i have bought and sold from ebay before and i knew there was the chance that the last five minutes i could still get outbid, so i sat refreshing the page every 5 seconds 

just to be sure i was still the high bidder.

then when there were only 35 seconds left 

all of a sudden 

someone comes bursting out with a higher bid and 

i tried to put my new bid in and hit return 

and boom i was outbid 

and the sale was over 

i was so shocked i didn't get that one. 

 i mean i really really felt like i had that one.

 Suzi Blu has a great conversation 

going on over at her place

 and it has been about vulgarity 

and freedom and art 

and the myths of lady-like and 

socially accepted values and a whole lot more.

i embraced vulgarity and ranted

Visual changes made me sick, all of a sudden

 the computer screen seemed to be caving in, i stood up and my entire body glowed red, 

i lay on the coach but then the heat and sweat overtook me and i had to find the cold floor and i vomited. thought i'd die it lasted so long, puking emotion.  i have to admit i did begin to make deals with the devil 

after i'd been throwing up all night monday and 

all day tuesday saw the doc again wednesday and 

got a shot in my butt to stop the nausea so today i'm back. 

I heard today again:

we can choose to be

choose to be bitter and sad and sick

or

we can choose to be happy and fairly healthy

today i choose to be happy even tho my butt still hurts from the shot.

thanks Suzi i love your art and your attitude.

we love it we need it we want it

rainbows and promises